Microdosing Visibility
A more sustainable way to move through the fear of being seen
Lately I’ve been noticing the gap between the version of me that exists privately, and the version of me I actually allow to be seen by the world.
And as soon as I wrote “the world,” I paused, because I caught myself writing from the part of me that still fears visibility, and that desiring it somehow makes me “cringe.”
I was skirting around what I actually meant. Which is, of course… The internet.
This isn’t the first time I’ve felt this tension. Back in November, I wrote about my complicated relationship with being seen—this push and pull between wanting to express myself fully, and the part of me that feels safer holding back and playing small.
It’s been five months since I wrote that piece, and I’d be lying if I said that tension was gone. But something about it has started to shift, along with how I’m choosing to move through it.
I’ve learned there’s a depth to my inner landscape that lives primarily in my thoughts, my journals, and the ways I process and make meaning of the world, …and then there’s what I actually choose to express outwardly.
Which, in all honesty, is only a fraction. (a softened, edited-down, more digestible fraction at that).
It’s not that I’m being inauthentic, I’ve just been selective about what I share online. And that selectivity isn’t random. It comes from fear.
Fear of what others will think if I show the real me: in all my depth, complexity, and without filtering it into something more curated.
I’ve spent so much of my life learning how to present myself in ways that felt more acceptable and palatable to others, all in an effort to be liked. And in doing so, I learned how to fit into an image rather than fully inhabit my full, authentic Self.
But over the past year, I’ve slowly started to shift that. This Substack, especially, has become the primary place where I’ve begun to explore a more honest way of sharing. I’ve pushed myself to write and publish in a way that is less filtered and curated. More real and honest.
It’s been freeing and expansive, but I also know I’m still holding back. And at the same time, I’m starting to recognize that my ideas and perspectives have value—that they can actually help others feel seen, understood, and a little less alone in their own experiences.
I’m also realizing that no matter what season of life I’m in, my purpose will always involve using my voice. Because no matter how much I hold back or avoid it, it keeps resurfacing. Whether I act on it or not, there’s something in me that keeps wanting to be expressed more fully.
The All-or-Nothing Trap
Last week I wrote about perfectionism, the different masks it wears, and how it quietly interferes in our lives in ways we don’t always recognize. For me, one of its favorite disguises is the pressure I put on myself to do something fully, perfectly, with 120% effort… or not do it at all. It’s a very black-and-white, all-or-nothing way of thinking.
As I’ve pushed myself to share more over the last year, I’ve noticed I tend to swing between extremes: I’m either forcing myself to show up consistently, publish every week, and post daily, leaving little room for missteps… or I swing to the other side and don’t do it at all. Because what’s the point, if I can’t do it the “right” way?
It can be hard to catch this pattern in the moment, but I’m starting to see that this is just another tactic of the perfectionistic part of me. Although frustrating in hindsight, awareness is the first step. Because once you recognize it, you can start to notice when it shows up in real time and intentionally choose a different approach.
Which is what I’m doing now, and what I’m sharing with you today.
A Different Way Forward
I’m currently coming out of one of those “nothing” seasons—the side of the spectrum where my motivation has been low, my mind hasn’t felt clear, and my insecurities have felt louder than ever, making it easier to stay quiet than to share anything at all.
But over the past month, I’ve felt a return of creative energy and a sense of momentum. And because I’ve learned that one of the quickest ways to extinguish a rekindled flame is to throw all your energy into it at once and burn out just as quickly, I’m intentionally choosing to approach it differently.
Instead of jumping to the extreme and trying to follow a perfectly executed, hyper-structured plan, I’m experimenting with something new: Microdosing Visibility.
Microdosing Visibility
Microdosing visibility is taking small, intentional steps where the goal is simply getting more comfortable being seen—think of it like exposure therapy.
Rather than trying to make huge, sweeping changes or set goals far beyond our current comfort level, real change tends to happen when we stretch just beyond our comfort zone and let it expand from there.
It’s less about doing more, and more about lowering the threshold for being seen, while gradually building confidence and consistency over time.
This is what that looks like for me right now:
Instead of setting a goal of posting every single day after hardly posting at all, I’m aiming for 2–3 posts a week.
Instead of trying to show up everywhere, I’m focusing on the platforms that feel most natural right now: Substack, where I’ve already built a rhythm, and TikTok, where I feel more comfortable sharing in a real-time, less filtered way.
Instead of forcing myself onto platforms that bring up more resistance (hi, Instagram), I’m letting myself build momentum and confidence first, trusting that I’ll meet that edge when I’m ready.
Instead of spending hours editing and perfecting, I’m practicing making things simpler and more efficient. This looks like setting time limits (i.e. one hour max for editing), or stopping at 70%, or “good enough” (harder than it sounds, and very humbling for a perfectionist).
Instead of waiting until something feels fully formed, I’m letting myself share ideas while they’re still in process. I’m intentionally closing the time gap between when the idea comes and when I feel “ready” enough to execute on it.
Instead of pressuring myself to constantly reinvent the wheel with fresh content on the daily, I’m focusing on repurposing and expanding on ideas that already exist (i.e. utilizing and breaking down ideas from my longer-form writing).
Instead of overwhelming myself with a long list of expectations each day, I’m focusing on one small step at a time. Sometimes that looks like just writing. Sometimes filming. Sometimes editing or posting.
Beyond Visibility
Whether you’re navigating a fear of being seen or not, this idea of “microdosing” can be applied to almost anything you’re working to become more comfortable with.
The concept is about stretching yourself just enough to grow, without pushing so far that you shut down, lose momentum, or quit.
While I know this approach won’t always feel easeful or natural, I can already tell it offers a more sustainable alternative than constantly swinging between extremes.
Little by Little
I’m not forcing myself into visibility in a way that feels overwhelming, and I’m also not waiting until I feel completely ready. Because we all know waiting to feel “ready” is just an illusion.
I’m simply allowing myself to be seen and heard in my fullest expression, little by little.
The fear hasn’t gone away, but it feels a lot more manageable when I’m not asking myself to override it all at once.
The reality is, good things take time. They require consistency that’s sustainable rather than forced, and a system that isn’t constantly caught in a cycle of go, go, go, burnout, repeat.
Because more often than not, it’s progress, not perfection, that actually moves the needle.
I’d love to hear how this resonated, or if you’re navigating your own version of visibility or “microdosing” right now. Let’s chat in the comments!
As always, thank you so much for being here.
love seeing you though
love this <3